Why Superman Sucks & Batman Owns

Out of all DC Comics characters, Superman is the one hero that I think he sucks major ass. I never got interested in his story, his comics, his cartoon, or even his movies. Even though I have some admiration for Smallville, Clark Kent is certainly not as compelling as other superheroes out there. And by other, I mean Batman. Of course, I’m not going to set here and be all judgmental without giving any convincing reasons. Allow me to share with you my personal list on why Batman kicks the crap out of Superman (which he actually did in The Dark Knight Returns) anytime.

  • Batman had a much more tragic childhood; watching your parents die is infinitely worse than hearing your biological parents died without ever having met them.
  • Batman’s crime-fighting style is based more on intelligence and planning while Superman almost always relays on brute force.
  • Batman is a detective, a scientist, a master of disguise, and a martial arts expert; Superman is a burly asshole in a red cape with big muscles.
  • Even though both characters steadfastly refuse to kill their enemies under any circumstances; it’s just a hell of a lot harder for Batman, which makes his attitude toward mercy all the more admirable.
  • It’s five times harder for Batman to do anything, which Superman takes for granted on a daily basis, yet he often does it a hell of a lot better.

32 responses to this post.

  1. Batman can’t fly. nuff said πŸ˜›


  2. Posted by Nymphadora on April 14, 2008 at 8:16 am

    some one agrees with me :p
    i’m going to ask my brothers to read this post :p maybe it will help curing them from their supermania :p


  3. Always a fan of batman. The rest suck. Love the whole dark and gothic act. Oh. Love the suit too πŸ™‚

    p.s Superman’s a fag.


  4. I heart both superman and batman simultaneously. I refuse to pick one. They are both my lovers.


  5. looool! I have to admire your passion for Batman, I do agree the Dark Knight has it tougher for him and he thinks through everything and every enemy. But Superman is powerful, even though he has his strength, he fights those monsters that are up to his strength and takes the beating even if it kills him like Doomsday.

    But Batman has the skills and lives a darker life because he is the meanest of the good guys, his mercy is based on not killing the criminal but torture is not out of the question. I always loved the Dark Knight Series of DC Comics.


  6. I prefer Spiderman any day. Batman is nothing without his gadgets and Superman only has one weakness :/


    • Posted by Flozini3000 on June 22, 2011 at 9:37 pm

      thats not true at all. batman has the skill to to take out 360 grown men with or with out his gadgets. Just using his gadgets makes things way easier.


  7. Posted by Sushi on April 14, 2008 at 11:20 pm

    I hate superman’s red underwear worn over blue tights. You’re right Batman rules.


  8. I have to agree with Marzouq. Superman is powerful and is from another world and most of the monsters he fights are upto his level! The thing is with Batman, we can identify more with him since he is a mere human. It just adds to his character! Amazing comparison!


  9. Superman can fly. Nuff said! πŸ˜›


  10. @Yousef

    It seems your comment was stuck in the comment queue but I fitch it πŸ™‚

    Flying is overrated. Bad ass skills FTW!


    LOL spread the love πŸ™‚

    @Disturbed Stranger

    The suit is a kick ass and the automobile is just plain awesome.


    Whatever works for you πŸ˜›


    Well put Marzouq. But I still like Batman more. Cannot wait for the movie btw.


    I love Spiderman as well but he’s a Marvel character. I’m drawing a comparison between the most popular DC Comics characters only.


    *high five*


    Well each one has his preferences but I still think Batman rules. Glad you enjoyed the post πŸ™‚


  11. wordpress hates me


  12. Posted by Daloo3a on April 22, 2008 at 1:26 pm

    I LOVEEEEE SUPERMAN!! I sleep with him every night πŸ˜› well a tshirt with superman on it, he keeps me safe πŸ˜› haha


  13. Posted by Superman1 on August 7, 2008 at 11:15 am

    look iam a fan of superman but iam not saying that batman suck because he doesn’t they both are from DC so you guys and girls should like both of them because they both fight for the same cause. So even if batman cant fly he is still cool and superman as will so dont hate superman like u dont like it when they say stuff about batman you shouldn’t be saying bad stuff about superman they are both from DC πŸ™‚


  14. Posted by you ass on November 6, 2008 at 3:51 pm

    you ass. you just ripped off an article by Anthony Burch that has been published across the internet. have some creativity.


  15. Posted by mcmuffin234 on December 30, 2008 at 7:00 pm

    I have to admit batman is a great superhero but superman is too

    i believe that ur wrong about sayn that its harder for batman to kill someone than superman…. just think if u had superman’s strength
    and u hated somebody and u wanted to kill just one punch and baam gone like that

    superman and batman are very different heroes but theyr goals are the same


  16. Posted by supermanfan7 on January 25, 2009 at 5:50 pm

    your all jus jealous of superman in da video wit superman and batman superman laid batman’s ass out. batman had 2 be a pussy and pull out kryptonite. yea batman knos martial arts but dat wont work on superman, superman will jus wreck him again. o and dat last comment “he has robbin” if batman was great y would he need robbin u eva think of dat. and yea batman kne his parents and they were killed in front of him but thats knot as bad as ur whole fuckin planet blowing up and nobody of ur kind is left. i will admit batman is smart but knot smart enuf 2 take down a crackhead wit make up like da joker. i jus wanna make my point so everybody doesnt start hatin superman and start likin batman 4 da wrong reasons like the ones up there by sum idiot


  17. Posted by Novichok on January 28, 2009 at 10:17 pm

    Batman keeps a kryptonite bullet that superman gave in his belt at all times. Superman went crazy one day and Batman shot and killed Sups with the Kryptonite bullet. End of Discussion.


  18. Posted by feejeean_bati on October 20, 2009 at 12:38 am

    wat tha fark .. batman nd superman aren’t even real nd u guys ar arguing lyk a bunch of pussies …
    hahahahahaha … tha world shud read dis .., hahahaha


    • Posted by Batman on February 12, 2012 at 11:19 am

      Shut the fuck up retard. If you had no interest in this why the hell did you read it and comment? what the fuck is a fark? Go back to school and learn to spell dipshit


  19. Posted by Jimmy on December 18, 2010 at 5:14 am

    Using Green Arrow’s help and a Kyrptonite arrow is far from beating the crap out of Superman.

    Besides, Batman isn’t even a superhero. Enough said.


  20. Posted by Crazy guy on June 3, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    I love batman but come on ITS FUCKING SUPERMAN FOLKS THE MAN HAS TO MANY POWERS. Superman can beat just about all heros including Batman with his heat vision.


  21. Batman all the way πŸ˜€


  22. Posted by CASEY on August 21, 2012 at 2:49 pm



  23. Posted by Zezinho on January 24, 2013 at 8:21 pm

    And I hate the fact that superman destroys the whole Metropolis whenever hes fighting. Cant he just move the battle to somewhere else less populated…


  24. Posted by BatmanRobin on February 12, 2013 at 7:25 pm

    Amen. Batman is definitely better. Batman and Robin kick butt on a regular basis and they don’t even have superpowers! Batman worked hard to get where he is, whereas Superman was gifted with the power to defy gravity and crush sculls between his thighs ever since he hit Earth. suck it Clark you’ll never beat Batman. You kryptonite sucking, Lois —–, blue pantied alian! Batmans a billionaire! And everyone knows that money is the real superpower.


  25. Money rules man. He will stab the blue guy with a green dagger. Get it? See poster of Injustice.


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